Friday, September 26, 2014

Can we be BFFs?


Over the past few years I've really come to realise how much of a funny thing friendship is. We see so many articles about friendship and representations of friendship (in particular that of 'best friends') in films and on TV, but I've come to learn that actually, it's all a bit fake. Now before I offend anyone, I'm not saying friendships are fake, and if you have a friendship that fits into that BFF status then I really am happy for you, but for most people it's not like that. The representations of BFFs on TV and in films just aren't as realistic as they should be - unfortunately, we don't all have a friendship like that of Rachel, Ross, Monica, Chandler, Phoebe and Joey.

I moved away from where I grew up the June before I started university. I didn't drive, and I was moving about an hour away from the friends I had at school, so we didn't see each other as much as we wished. I tried to see the girls as much as I could, but with some of them, we didn't really end up talking as much. I then headed off to uni and made a lovely group of friends, but again, now I've graduated we don't really live close to each other. If someone was to look at my friends, you wouldn't see the typical tell each other everything and see each other everyday sort of thing you see on TV. I don't have a typical BFF relationship with anyone. 

But the friends I do have, especially my closest friends, really are truly incredible. When I needed them most, they were there, and that's what friendship really is about. My relationship of almost three years ended at the start of September, and it was then that I really found how true of a friend these girls were. Two of the girls from university made a spontaneous trip to London to have dinner with me to make sure I was okay, another phoned me just after it happened even though she was busy at work (because separating dried fruit is a tough afternoons work okay?!) and the love and support I have had from my best friends since it happened has been incredible. 

The truth is, the friendships you see on TV and in movies, and that there are articles written about (like this one on Buzzfeed) is not what a lot of friendships are about. It's not about seeing each other everyday, or being inseparable, but rather about who's going to be there for you when you need them most and how nothing changes even after a long time of not seeing each other. I am so thankful for the close friends I have in my life, and I hope they know that. 

Sophie x

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